This is an angry rant. If you don’t like bad words, you might not want to continue. However, I’ve had it to here with the bullshit stories about black women that I’ve seen popping up this week. I’ve put the text after the break as a precaution.
This week has been a week FULL of nonsense articles DEMOTING the black woman and her spirit. Every other article I’ve seen in the media, and even on so-called blogs “for black women” has talked about how black women aren’t getting married, black women need to date out more, black women are not desirable. BULLSHIT. Don’t tell me that you stand for me when you’re shitting in my ear.
Yesterday, Essence had an article posted by a site that I read that says, “Oh, well, if you were going natural to save money, you’re not really saving money – you might even be paying more“. It had a very “Why bother?” to it. People like this are COMPLETELY missing the point. For one, if someone wants to save money, they’d just learn to do their hair at home. Even if they’re relaxed, they could save more money at home learning how to properly relax their hair at home, themselves.
The point in going natural, for the majority of black women that I have encountered who are doing it, is because we want to embrace ourselves, not the selves that we are told through marketing and advertising media that we should be. Yes, products for natural hair care might cost more. And yes, when you’re first starting out natural, you tend to get this need to try EVERYTHING OMG and see what it does to your hair. But after she finds out what does and what doesn’t work for her hair, the typical natural lady will pick a regimen and stick to it. It’s a new field for us, all over again, so we’re going to want to experiment. And if you’re not being fussy with your products, it probably doesn’t cost that much at all.
Secondly, there’s the “black women” and “marriage” crisis that seems to have stirred up new hands, feet, and heads since a happy, stable Black family took up residence in the office of the most powerful man in the world. I think there’s quite a few people who are uncomfortable with the fact – after promoting so many images of dysfunctional black families and communities all over the media for everyone to see and stereotype with – that there can be happy, healthy Black families with a Black father present in the house. It almost seems as if they’re afraid that we’ll get encouraged from the President, and that we’ll start doing better as a community.
That little Black boys and girls might wish to grow up to be Baracks and Michelle in their own right.
If the “you must date interracially to get married” onslaught was bad before, it’s on fire now. By the way, interracially apparently only means white men, who seem to be the only men in the world to these pundits. I just needed to note that. Newsflash, though, American media: the world is not just black and white people – hell, it’s not even PREDOMINATELY black and white people when you account for the fact that China and India have far, far bigger populations than our measly little country.
And now, for the post that spurred this angry, angry Black woman blog: apparently the shock and awe of “black women need to date white men in order to be loved” has worn off. Now there’s this article suggesting that black women might need to date and marry bisexual men in order to get married.
Excuse me?
What?
Exposing yourself to someone who sleeps around is bad enough, but now we’re supposed to expose ourselves to even more lunacy and danger? To wit, I have no problem with bisexuality. I’d tell you to ask any of my college friends, but we won’t go into that. I am not homophobic in. the. least.
What I am phobic of, though, is the four letter kiss of death, or any other STDs running rampant. It’s enough having to worry about your partner remaining faithful if they have one sexual preference, but this article seems to suggest that hey, bisexual men are good looking, a little metro, sensitive, and awesome, then it’s okay to look past the fact that they might want to get their freak on with one of their homeboys on the weekend, right? They even talk about “well if it’s okay for a woman to be bisexual in a relationship, then why not men?”.
Answer: it’s not alright in either context. If you want to be a bisexual dater, good for you. That’s wonderful. But the minute you put the ring on anyone’s finger, your goodies should be on soulbound to that particular person and no one else. I don’t care if you have an innie, an outtie, or a dual shock controller. Keeping your promise to stay faithful to one another keeps you and your partner healthy and safe.
So go ahead media. Keep trying to feed black women bullshit lies about how nobody wants us and we need to be willing to settle for less than what we desire. But don’t tell me that you stand for me when you’re really against me. The Black women of the world will know better. We have the Internet now, and from what I last heard, Black Americans are starting to use it more than the mainstream population. We’re becoming the publishers of our own content, and we won’t have to depend on your self-defeatist and self-destructive content for much longer.